wardrobespierre:

~flower prince on public transport~

wardrobespierre:

~flower prince on public transport~

On Short Hair: A Frustrated Essay

kristinnoeline:

iamlightyear:

dannielle:

parentsproject:

by Dannielle Owens-Reid, co-founder of The Parents Project

In August of last year I decided to grow my hair out to what I like to call “lady length.” I told everyone it was because I’d wanted to for a while, but in the past, once it hit an awkward length I’d always give up and cut it again. This time, I was going to stick with it! Plus, it didn’t hurt that the girl I was halfway dating thought I looked pretty with long hair. And I wanted to wear more hats because I love the way hats look with long hair. Annnnd it’s easier to work out if I can just put my hair in a ponytail and call it a day. These are all the excuses I gave everyone (and myself, to some extent). 

If you want to know the truth, I was tired of being called ‘sir’ at the airport. Every time I hit that TSA checkpoint someone calls me sir. There was a specific time at LaGuardia in New York where I had to go through the weird body-scan-radiation-machine twice because the gender they chose was ‘male.’ Since I was wearing a bra, the little screen had a red box right around my chest which obviously confused the person in charge of the machine. Eventually, another TSA employee said, “I think he’s a girl” and then winked at me. As if we were all in on a joke. As if saying “he’s a girl” is funny or comforting or cute in some way. 

We were not in on a joke. At all.

I fly a lot for work, and feeling uncomfortable and on the verge of tears at least once per month is not an ideal situation. 

This is why I decided, last August, to grow out my hair. I told everyone on earth that I liked it because the fact of the matter is, I liked that people weren’t confused about my gender. I liked that I could dress in clothes from the men’s section without being referred to as a man. I don’t know why this gender-confusion bothers me so much, but it does. It bothers me so much that I gave up having a haircut that actually feels more ‘me,’ because I wanted my outward appearance to let people know they should call me “ma’am” instead of “sir.”

I already spend countless hours feeling completely uncomfortable in clothing stores because I think women’s clothes look stupid on me, and men’s clothes never fit me. I feel just as uncomfortable in heels and a dress as I do in a men’s suit. I’ve managed to find a few things that sort of fit me the way I want, but how am I even supposed to figure out what I want? There are so few options for anyone who wants to dress in something that is not one of those two extremes. You have to choose between MEN and WOMEN, that’s it. Those are the options. You can wear lace or you can wear a jersey.  

So, there I was. And, here I am.

A few weeks ago I chopped all of my hair off again.

I’m still at a weird juncture with my appearance nearly every day because I don’t feel right in any of the clothes I can buy in stores or online, and because while I don’t want my appearance to match “ma’am,” I also don’t want to be referred to as “sir.” The length of my hair is a part of that confusion – and I am at a loss, even living in Los Angeles in 2014. I can’t imagine what it must have been like for anyone in a similar situation who didn’t have even the few options that we do today.

There’s a cashier at Trader Joe’s who always calls me “buddy.” I’m 90% sure it’s because he has no clue what my gender is, and I really like that he doesn’t try to figure out whether my gender matches my face or my clothes. He’s just like “Hey, here’s a person I like. ‘What’s up, buddy?’” 

I really, really appreciate that

***

I wrote this thing.

Read this

Important. 💕

lokicolouredglasses:

fandom-universe:

kungfucarrie:

The most dangerous phrase in the language is, “we’ve always done it this way.”

"Come on, let’s mix it up!" The heart surgeon says.
"B-but we’ve always done it this way!" The other replies, "this is how you replace a heart valve."
"That’s the most dangerous phrase in the human language!" The first surgeon replies haughtily as he inputs a fruit loop into the patient’s heart. "This will be his valve. He will be a fruit loop in a world of Cheerios."


(taken from this post on the experiments of Harry Harlow)
This is serious business, because this is a large part of how sexism, racism, homophobia, rape culture, ethnocentrism, etc. continue to happen.

lokicolouredglasses:

fandom-universe:

kungfucarrie:

The most dangerous phrase in the language is, “we’ve always done it this way.”

"Come on, let’s mix it up!" The heart surgeon says.

"B-but we’ve always done it this way!" The other replies, "this is how you replace a heart valve."

"That’s the most dangerous phrase in the human language!" The first surgeon replies haughtily as he inputs a fruit loop into the patient’s heart. "This will be his valve. He will be a fruit loop in a world of Cheerios."

(taken from this post on the experiments of Harry Harlow)

This is serious business, because this is a large part of how sexism, racism, homophobia, rape culture, ethnocentrism, etc. continue to happen.

(Source: uvmsemba, via she-must-be-a-lesbian)

garbagelover666:

boyexemplified:

yeahnodudehella:

Masculinity is so fragile.

MAN CAVE STRONG! PROTECT FAMILY, DEPENDABLE FISHING!!!

COMPASSIONATE SPORTS!!!! ELECTRONIC FATHER

garbagelover666:

boyexemplified:

yeahnodudehella:

Masculinity is so fragile.

MAN CAVE STRONG! PROTECT FAMILY, DEPENDABLE FISHING!!!

COMPASSIONATE SPORTS!!!! ELECTRONIC FATHER

(via erinkrystynax)

rubee:

ilovemaydayparade69:

rubee:

"why dont you just give him a chance"

idk because im not physically or mentally attracted to him and ‘but he likes you’ or ‘but hes really nice’ isnt going to change the fact that im not interested

Damn, I don’t think women know how much that really hurts

you know what else hurts?????????? getting abused for being a ‘bad person’ because you didnt want to date somebody that you werent interested in

(via atomicqueen)

cocoastripper:

queer-punk:

WE NEED FEMINISM BECAUSE WHEN LANCE ARMSTRONG GOT CANCER AND LOST A TESTICLE IT WAS ALL ABOUT HIS HEALTH AND HOW INSPIRATIONAL HE WAS BUT WHEN ANGELINA JOLIE GETS A DOUBLE MASTECTOMY TO PREVENT HERSELF FROM GETTING CANCER, IT’S ALL ABOUT HOW SHE WON’T BE A SEX SYMBOL ANYMORE AND HOW MEN ARE OFFENDED CAUSE SHE WON’T BE AN OBJECT FOR THEM 

I’m pretty sure I reblog this already but this need to be reblog again

(via puke-ahontas)

frustrated-fallen-angel:

gallifreyanprincess:

insanitymobs:

asktheminecrafthuntress:

ykfinch:

ask-shadefire-midnight-and-elsa:

askdiamonddust:

funnyandhilarious:

New type of airplane… »

Oh hell nah!

My dad would be terrified

I would want the aisle seat.

Imagine it’s a late night flight, and everyone’s dozing off. In your half-asleep stupor you look down at the floor and you see a face gazing in at you through the glass, a face of something not quite human..

welcome to Tumblr, where the most interesting topics twist into nightmares.

how cool

frustrated-fallen-angel:

gallifreyanprincess:

insanitymobs:

asktheminecrafthuntress:

ykfinch:

ask-shadefire-midnight-and-elsa:

askdiamonddust:

funnyandhilarious:

New type of airplane… »

Oh hell nah!

My dad would be terrified

I would want the aisle seat.

Imagine it’s a late night flight, and everyone’s dozing off. In your half-asleep stupor you look down at the floor and you see a face gazing in at you through the glass, a face of something not quite human..

welcome to Tumblr, where the most interesting topics twist into nightmares.

how cool

(via swissfranc)

stunningpicture:

Out having a pint with a friend when my wife sent me this.

stunningpicture:

Out having a pint with a friend when my wife sent me this.

(via comewanderintomyinsanity)

caelas:

girls are so hot???? like i see a hot girl every 2 seconds.  and a hot guy about every 2 weeks.  and even then i’m wary because he might end up yelling something rude at me or making a rape joke or something

(via puke-ahontas)

chicklikemeblog:

chelseapoe:

androfeminine:

"Trans-misogyny is still misogyny" -Sophia

i want that shirt so badly

This is both a trans reblog and a style reblog

chicklikemeblog:

chelseapoe:

androfeminine:

"Trans-misogyny is still misogyny" -Sophia

i want that shirt so badly

This is both a trans reblog and a style reblog

(via wardrobespierre)

causedarlingitwasgood:

how is this even a real show

(Source: michaelsocha, via swissfranc)

choctawaukerman:

I’ve been laughing for 20 years

choctawaukerman:

I’ve been laughing for 20 years

(via swissfranc)

Posts I Like